In Not My Father’s Son, Alan Cumming writes a moving tale of intersecting lives. One of them is his own. He tells how his father and grandfather affected him, in vastly different ways. I listened on audio, and I’d recommend hearing Cumming tell his own story. His Scottish accent and acting chops add immeasurably to the telling.
Cumming grew up with an abusive father, so listening to his stories was tough. Much as the childhood sections are harrowing, the way his father continues to manipulate his grown sons is unconscionable.
Cumming also traces the process of recording a TV show about finding the true story of his maternal grandfather’s life. He shares the amazement he feels about the similarities between his own life story and his grandfather’s. They are parallel, but also vastly different.
Learning about our genealogy is a personal type of mystery tale. The suspense comes from research documents, DNA, and lots of digging. Cumming takes what might seem dry and boring and adds an emotional, human perspective. Once I started listening, I couldn’t put it down. It was, in fact, captivating.
Now that I’ve read this memoir, I want to track down the genealogy show he was filming during the book. It’ll be interesting to see the locations he discusses and visits in the book, as well as his reactions to the information.
Another topic Cumming explores is what being famous can bring into your life. For example, reporters calling at the most inopportune moments. But he also uses his desire to do good in the world to benefit the LGBTQIA+ communities and to raise awareness of abuse. Kudos to him for that!
I admire Alan Cumming as a writer, actor, and man working to understand his place in the world. It’s a universal struggle that’s relatable, yet unique. This is a memoir I may listen to again—it’s just that good!
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